Maternal Mental Health Month Day 12

And the weekend arrives…

Most people very much look forward to their weekend (or days off if you work weekends) but for many moms, it feels like another two days of work.  Moms suffering from PMADs may look forward to having their partner around on the weekends but may also feel more pressure to seem their best as someone else is around.  They may feel the pressure to spend time with their partner, seem their happiest and most energetic, and fulfill their children’s every need.  Even for moms not suffering from PMADs, there can be a lot of pressure on the weekends…be productive, make family time, do projects, run errands, a chance for personal time with your partner around but also the pressure to have time with your partner.  Too many expectations and not enough time…unless…you get creative…

Something for them, something for us/you, something productive.  

This is my mantra (and not just for weekends but let’s start there).  Most of the time it happens each day but sometimes it’s about the weekend as a whole.  The idea is to find a way to have something for them (the kids), something for us/you (the parent/parents), something productive (errand, project, etc).

Some simple examples:

Saturday is a birthday party for a friend’s child (that’s something for them…the kids get to play with other kids).  Maybe you can fit in an errand before or after the party.  Or one adult can take the kids to the party while the other does chores.  This will leave time for a family activity (even just playing a game in the yard) or an adult activity (like a trip to a vineyard).  

If a day is completely monopolized by one area…perhaps the kids have sports games and a party to attend which takes the majority of the day, then resign yourself to that day being kid-focused.  That means that the next day can be more heavily chores/projects or adult activity.  This might be a time to get a sitter for a date day/night.  

Other ways to make the most of your weekend…

  • spend the morning/day doing chores, projects and errands in exchange for having friends over in the late afternoon/evening for dinner and playing time for the kids.
  • borrow one of your child’s friends to take on errands.  They will keep each other entertained, feel like they are getting a “playdate” and the trip will hopefully go smoother.  Then take this friend to your house to play while you unpack your shopping and clean up a bit around the house. 
  • trade days or part days with a family friends.  You take their kids in the morning, they take yours in the afternoon.  Or you take their kids on Saturday and they take yours on Sunday.  If the kids are occupied playing, you can actually have an adult conversation or get some things done around the house. 

The options are endless if you get creative and think about how to make your productive time, fun time too.  You can still look forward to the weekends!  

About Carpe Diem Counseling LLC

I am a licensed clinical social worker whose practice specializes in working with women (and their families) during the pregnancy and postpartum time period. Please contact me if you believe you or someone in your life is experiencing a Perinatal or Postpartum mental health issue. I also work with any adults experiencing a life change and struggling with the challenges and adjustments they are encountering. Addressing our struggles in life happens one day at a time. There is no wrong time to get help.
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